Winning isn't everything, and it's not the primary reason I want to compete however. It's nice to have a shiny piece of metal signifying that you've made an accomplishment, but the deeper meaning behind it all is testing myself. Putting yourself in a challenging situation with seemingly impossible odds of getting out "alive" persay, and finding out what you're made of. That to me is the true essence of competition. Whether I win, lose, or completely get my ass kicked in every match, I know that I'll walk out of there feeling proud having stepped up to the challenge and given it my all.
Training has been going well, but it's also been draining the hell out of me and it's tricky trying to find that delicate balance between training and getting enough rest. I've been going to the gym three days a week, and to class in between then (some days I've been going to class on top of going to the gym) I've been doing a lot of running as well to help train for the Navy 10k race which happens the week after the tournament. I'd like to beat my time from last year which was just over an hour. Aside from running I've been doing core exercises, some weight training (dead lifts, dumb bell work, machines, etc.) and a new workout which I've found here:
http://jitsmagazine.com/articles/entry/using-complexes-to-boost-your-muscle-endurance
I kept the weight light the first time I tried it, but man, it still kicked my ass! I sweat like a demon and felt like a million bucks afterward though, so I strongly encourage anyone brave enough to try it to do so. With the tournament quickly approaching my plan of attack is to lighten up on the physical training aspect and focus more on drills, technique, and rolling at a light to moderate pace whenever I can. I'll gradually scale this back as the tournament draws closer and have a few days to rest and reenergize myself. Yesterday instead of running or weight training I spent an hour just doing basic movement drills; stand up in base, sitting out, rocker steps, triangle-ing the legs, etc. It was a great workout in and of itself, and should be light enough to keep me from burning myself out.
Moving on to the nutrition side of things, I've completely cut out bread from my diet and have stuck to simple recipes. I've been eating a lot of eggs, rolled oats, fresh & frozen vegetables, brown rice, and extra lean cuts of meat for as my primary protein source such as chicken, and ground turkey. I've been snacking on greek yogurt with high fiber cereal mixed into it in the mornings (sounds kind of gross but it's actually awesome!) and a mixture of baby carrots and celery in the afternoons. So far it's been working really well for me and here's what my scale had to show me this morning:
So long as I keep doing what I'm doing and avoid any kind of junk food I should "make the cut" with ease.
Getting back to feelings of nervousness again, this was a post I was going to publish last week about my training, but decided to hold off on doing so until now. The following four paragraphs have been written in the past tense:
[Previous Draft Post Begin]
Today was one of those humbling kind of days. The kind of days where you feel like giving up because you keep getting completely crushed by your opponents, but push through. I haven't been to class yet this week so I decided I'd stay for two hours to get some extra training time in. I was training with a partner who was at least 25lbs. heavier than me, more experienced, and tapped me out every chance he could. I kept making the same mistakes and getting caught in the same submissions. It seemed like no matter what I tried I would quickly fail, and have to tap out. Moving into the second hour of class was no better. I was sore and each submission felt more painful than the last. My legs hurt. My shoulders hurt. My neck hurt. I felt like getting up, bowing out, and going home. I felt completely outclassed in every way and just wanted it to be over with. I felt like quiting. I felt like walking off the mats and never coming back... but that's not why I joined Jiu Jitsu!
I don't train just so I can quit. "Tapping out" doesn't mean quitting. I have no problem with tapping out, that's just the nature of the game, and it's often a much wiser decision than going home with a broken arm. As I was driving home thinking about the last two hours of training a couple of quotes I heard before popped into my head. The first was "It's okay to tap." from Keith Owen. He mentioned at one point during his visit that he doesn't care if people tap as long as they're working on something. The second is by Nic Gregoriades in a video entitled "The Spirit of Jiu Jitsu" who said "I want to be able to do this when I'm 60, you know?." I'm 33 years old now and that quote makes a lot of sense to me... if you haven't seen the video before I encourage you to watch it here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgjJWKV_36o
Quitting isn't in my nature no matter how difficult things become. I have always found a way to pick myself back up and keep moving forward. I've often referred to myself as "The Terminator" because no matter how much you beat me down I'll keep coming at you. Near the end of the second class I was asked if I wanted to roll. For a moment I thought of my sore shoulders, neck, and legs, yet almost instantly, and perhaps instinctually, I said yes. The same trend of trying everything I knew, and quickly failing went on again. Even though I was getting beaten over, and over again, I didn't give up. Sometimes I lasted 10 seconds, sometimes a minute. The one constant in today's training, and in fact all of the years of my training was this: I've never given up, and I never will!
I've been making progress in terms of cutting weight for the tournament as well. I've been going to the gym, getting out hiking, and dialing in my nutrition. I'm under the requirement of 168lbs. right now at 164.4, but think that may just be lack of fluids in my body. I had started at somewhere between 168-172 over the weekend and have yet to test my weight with a gi on. I plan on weighing in with my heavier blue gi on as a backup, and my white Venum gi as my primary.
The moral of the story: Do not give up. Never quit. No matter how difficult things become in your personal life, believe in yourself and have faith that everything will find a way to work itself out.
[Previous Draft Post End]
I look back on these words now and they're both empowering and memorial to me. A reminder of the tides of emotion than can overcome a practioner in the vast sea that is Jiu Jitsu. At times it is calm, with a clear glass surface where you swim through with ease. Other times it is undulent and can make you feel like you're drowning. I believe at its core, this is what makes Jiu Jitsu practioners stronger not only physically, but mentally, and spiritually alike. It's like being asked to learn how to swim with sharks all around you, and although you may be terried of sharks, you dive right in and start swimming.
With that being said, there are two hours of mat time I'm going to get in today, once of which is a grappling hour!
Stay tuned for the next update.
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